Verifying the Theories of Deborah Tannen's You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation with an Episode of Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher
The book You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation, written by Deborah Tannen, is an analytical book offering scientific insights on the conversational differences between women and men. The book is copyrighted 1990 and is still read and widely talked about all over the world. Tannen is a Professor of Linguistics at Georgetown University in Washington, D.C. Tannen is a graduate of the University of California-Berkeley and has a doctorate’s degree in linguistics. She is a highly creditable author who has written many books on social differences between women and men. Some of her other books include: That’s Not What I Meant: How Conversational Style Makes or Breaks Relationships and Talking From 9 to 5: Women and Men in the Workplace. Her books have been translated into 26 languages and are still read by thousands of people every year (Tannen 13).
Tannen’s Vocabulary Terms
One of Tannen’s major claims is that women use rapport-talk and men use report-talk. Women use their rapport-talk as “private speaking” (Tannen 77). It is a way to gain connections and negotiations with the people to which women talk. Women will establish similarities and matching experiences to make conversation. On the other hand, men normally talk using the report-talk. Tannen would consider this “public speaking.” Tannen defines report-talk as “the primary means to preserve independence and negotiate and maintain status in a hierarchical social order.” Tannen proceeds to explain how men exhibit their knowledge and skills by telling stories, joking, or even impartin...
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...n’t Understand have been put to the test. The episode of Politically Incorrect was a perfect representation of Tannen’s ideas and theories. My evidence definitely agrees with Tannen. The episode of Politically Incorrect demonstrated Tannen’s claims. Tannen’s vocabulary terms of report-talk and rapport-talk were exemplified throughout the episode. I find it quite amazing how accurate Tannen’s main arguments were. An interesting fact is that Tannen wrote You Just Don’t Understand over twelve years ago. Women and men have not changed their conversation styles in that twelve-year time period.
Works Cited
Politically Incorrect. Perf. Bill Maher, Tom Green, Howard Lyman, Humberto Fontova, and Florence Henderson. KCAU-9, Sioux City. 18 March 2002.
Tannen, Deborah. You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation. New York: First Quill, 2001.
The play involves a highly respected senator, Brutus, who decides to join the conspiracy to kill Julius Caesar, in the effort to keep democracy intact. Brutus believes that if Julius Caesar is allowed to live, Caesar will take a kingship and turn the government into a monarchy. Brutus, Cassius, and the other conspirators kill Julius Caesar, yet they find Antony, a loyalist of Caesar, seeks revenge on them. Plato set out rules on the traits a tragic hero must possess. A tragic hero must neither be an evil villain nor a great hero, instead the tragic hero must be either a flawed hero or a villain with some good traits. Also, the tragic hero must not deserve what mighty punishment is dealt to him. Another key feature of a tragic hero is the fact that a tragic hero must be a high-standing individual in society. The tragic hero must not deserve his punishment for the play to be a tragedy. Also, a tragedy happening to someone in high authority, will affect not only the single person but also society as a whole. Another reason for the tragic hero to be in high authority is to display that if a tragedy may happen to someone such as a king, it may just as easily happen to any other person. Julius Caesar fits the role of a tragic hero. Julius Caesar is a high standing senator that possesses hamartia, failings of human nature. Julius Caesar’s imperfections may be seen in three distinct aspects of Caesar, such as the following: his pride, his vacillation, and his ambition.
Tannen, Deborah. (1990). You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men Conversation. New York: Ballantine Books.
Extinction is no longer just a natural process. It is an enemy, slowly changing our world into a barren wasteland where life is as rare as a flower in the Arctic Circle's winter. The wolf, the tiger, the caribou, the elephant, the bison, the cheetah, the sequoia cactus, the redwood tree – all of these and so many more things are on the verge of disappearing from our planet forever. Extinction is the most pressing environmental issue of our time, because if it continues the way it is going without anything being done to counteract its causes and consequences, there will soon be no environment left for there to be debates about.
Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of men and women. Tannen observed that, "For males, conversation is the way you negotiate your status in the group and keep people from pushing you around; you use talk to preserve your independence. Females, on the other hand, use conversation to negotiate closeness and intimacy; talk is the essence of intimacy, so being best friends means sitting and talking. For boys, activities, doing things together, are central. Just sitting and talking is not an essential part of friendship. They're friends with the boys they do things with" (Tannen 95).
Vilaseca, R. & Del Rio M. (2004). Language acquisition by children with Down syndrome: a naturalistic approach to assisting language acquisition. Child Language Teaching and Therapy pp. 163-180.
This play can be summed up by looking at one character in particular. Brutus is a prime representation of how our government is. He started out wanting to do what was best for the people of Rome and ends up being corrupted by hid and others greed. He not only loses the sanctity of Romans, he loses himself in every action he takes in becoming a traitor. No longer is he a caring member of society, he has blackened his soul to the point of no return. Brutus was only out for number one, he became the person he tried to prevent coming into power. Ironically, he ends up dead as well, so his mission was accomplished in the end. No one who was greedy took charge.
In her article “But What Do You Mean” Deborah Tannen, claims that there is a huge difference in the style of communicating between men and women. Tannen breaks these down into seven different categories; apologies, criticism, thank-yous, fighting, praise, complaints, and jokes. With each of these she compares men to women by explaining the common misconceptions that each of the genders do. The different style of communication can cause some problems at the workplace and even affect the environment. The different styles of communication has been around forever and almost becomes a “ritual”(299). Tannen is effective with mainly women and not men. She is primarily successful with women due to the fact that her tone targets women, also the organization
Communication between males and females has always been somewhat complicated. Because we are arguing that males and females have different cultures we wanted to take a look at what some of these differences might be. According to our research the inherent differences between male and female culture are the different roles that society holds for them and the ways these roles lead to different communication styles. The stereotypes that men and women grow up with affect the types of ways in which they communicate. We first wanted to take a look at how they specifically differ while men and women are arguing or having normal conversations. We also looked at the different types of networks that men and women share. These networks also differ and as do the reasonings for their formation. Although we do not think that men and women need to change their cultures to effectively communicate, we do think that better communication is possible. One of the researchers we took a look at was Deborah Tannen. According to Tannen the reason that men and women do not communicate well is that men and women use language differently. Women take the attitude that conversation is to explore solutions to common problems while men concern themselves more with getting information and hard data from conversation. Tannen states that what women look for in communication is human connection, while men consider status to be most important. They are looking for independence and are constantly looking for higher accomplishments. Intimacy threatens this independence, so men have a tendency to avoid it. One of the old sayings about women is that they talk more than men. It turns out that it is not necessarily true. Women seem to talk more in private conversations than do men. Women do not generally have a fear of intimacy and therefore are much more open with one another during private conversations. It is more difficult for women to use this type of communication style in the public arena. In that case it is men that do most of the talking. Tannen ultimately argues that men use communication as a weapon. They use long explanations to command attention from who it is they are speaking to. They use it to convey information and to ultimately gain agreement. Tannen suggests that through even simple conversation men are continually protecting their status. She sugg...
Tannen, Deborah. “His Politeness Is Her Powerlessness.” You Just Don’t Understand: women and men in conversation. New York: HarperCollins, 1990. 203-5. Print.
In 1966, Congress passed the Endangered Species Preservation Act, a piece of legislation designed to provide limited protection to a list of native animal species. The Departments of Interior, Agriculture, and Defense were responsible for the protection of these species and the preservation of their habitats. It also allotted land to the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service to help maintain these natural habitats. In 1969, the Act was amended because further protection was necessary. With the threat of worldwide extinction, the amendment called for an international meeting and cha...
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”. Cameron conveys that the stereotypes left upon male and female communication
In the introduction of Deborah Tannen’s “Conversation Style: Talking on the Job”, she compares and contrasts the ways men and women communicate. This reminds me of what I tell people that are struggling in their relationships. Women and men express themselves differently. Women think, but men act. If you can’t wrap your head around this, being in a relationship with anyone is going to be hard. Yet, this is such a basic way of looking at this issue. Not only are the genders vastly different, but each person relates to the world around them in a certain way. He or she also needs to be related to in a specific way. Looking at personalities and personal histories can give a better look at the way we communicate with each other. Tannen examines
Lieberman, Simma. “Differences in Male and Female Communication Styles” Simma Lieberman Associates (undated). Retrieved February 25, 2010<
Saying that women talk more than men is another notion which is popular and accurately opposed against in the article. I also felt that it is majorly due to the different contexts in which men and women are analyzed that creates more difference. If some informal situation is considered and comparison made between the language and number of words spoken by men and women, I agree with the writer that there would only be some minor differences and more similarities where language and communication is concerned.
While sitting in Atlanta’s Hartsfield International Airport, one cannot help but to notice and feel an overwhelming dominant presence of one particular airline. Delta as we know it today, traces its roots way back to 1924. Huff Daland Dusters was founded as the world’s first aerial crop dusting organization. In 1928 the company became Delta Air Service, and the following year Delta carried its first passengers over a route stretching from Dallas, Texas to Jackson, Mississippi with stops in Shreveport and Monroe, Louisiana. In 1941, the company moved its headquarters from Monroe to Atlanta, Georgia.