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Article 20: Successful Praise When reading the article “The Perils and Promises of Praise”, I was taken aback by the fact that there was a thing as negative praise. The studies show that just telling someone that they are intelligent is detrimental to future success in challenging situations because of the fear of failure. Encouragement of hard work and effort works more effectively than praising intelligence. I still feel that there is a missing element that was not mentioned in the article. It is secret number three in motivation for success in school. That motivation is the parents of the students. I was told that if I failed my classes, I could expect severe punishment and retribution for my failure, unless I prove I tried my best. Motivation is not just praise; it is the support of those adults in a student’s life that gives reinforcement of positive ideas …show more content…
I left my school books inside the bottom of my desk, just as all the students had done in my class. My father was home on vacation that particular day and asked me where my books were. I replied that they were in my desk at school. That answer led to a ten minute lecture on how I was to never leave my books at school ever again. He told me that I would never succeed if I did not take schooling seriously. That was the only motivational speech I received while I was in school. That conversation affects me to this day. I bring all the books I am required to buy at the beginning of each term to my classes. I purchase my books the moment I find out what books I need for that quarter. I have always strived to excel in all the courses I take because of that conversation. My father intervening made me angry at the time; however, over time it made me reevaluate my approach to school. Yes, it was difficult to carry all those books home every day after school, especially in high school, but that was my
Because of his cultural background my father found my brother's poor performance in school incomprehensible. I too was puzzled by my brother's attitude towards school. He and I grew up in the same house with the same parents and the same set of values. Yet, he seemed to not care about school at all. For a long time, my family and I attributed my brother's C's in school and obvious inability to concentrate to laziness and a lack of motivation.
Psychologist, Carol S. Dweck in her well researched essay, “Brainology” analyzes how praise impacts mindset and how a growth mindset leads to greater success. She supports this claim by comparing the two different mindsets and how praise can affect them. She then proceeds to show praise leads to a fixed mindset harming a person by changing their views on effort. Finally, she argues that praise changes how and what people value, which can
Meaning that when children grow up with praise such as “oh you must have been so smart to get an A on that test”, instead of “you must have worked really hard on that lesson”, children could take the praise to their intelligence the wrong way and think that since they are “smart” instead of their effort on a task which will cause them problems in the future and they might want to give up and quit. I have seen this first hand and this has actually happened to me before, so I know from experience that this could have a negative effect impact on a student not just students in elementary school but also adults who are going to college or young adults who are looking for a job. In contrast, some students love to get that kind of compliment but they would always end up expecting that so when I work with children I will be complimenting them on the effort they put into everything that they do. From now on, I will be praising children on their effort and not on their
Every parent desires to have a child who will be successful in life. In “Brainology” author, Carol Dweck explains that there are consequences for praising children for their work. Dweck also explains that there are different types of mindsets that enable an individual’s development. She claims that there are two types of mindsets that people have. In a growth mindset, people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work ( Dweck 1). Furthermore growth mindset individuals love learning and are resilience that is essential for great accomplishment. (Dweck 1). One more theory, Dweck mentioned was fixed mindset. The author states “In a fixed mindset, people believe their basic qualities, like their intelligence
In When Success Leads to Failure, Jessica Lahey is faced with a tough situation involving a student, whose love for learning is fading, and a parent who does not seem to understand why. Lahey establishes that parents are starting to teach children to fear failure, and the fear is what is destroying their love for learning (Lahey). I support Lahey’s proposition that kids are beginning to hate learning because children are taught that failure is not an option. In today’s society, many teachers and especially parents push children to only strive for success and to fear failure, which results in many children’s growing hatred for learning.
I was raised in an encouraging household where both of my parents greatly valued education. Although they were high school graduates, neither could afford to attend college; a combination of family and financial woes ultimately halted their path. As a result, my parents frequently reminded me that getting a good education meant better opportunities for my future. To my parents, that seemed to be the overarching goal: a better life for me than the one they had. My parents wanted me to excel and supported me financially and emotionally of which the former was something their parents were not able to provide. Their desire to facilitate a change in my destiny is one of many essential events that contributed to my world view.
The “push to be perfect” (Thomas) is at an all-time high. Pressure for perfection from peers, parents, teachers and coaches is so unreasonably high that many students don’t think that they will ever be able to achieve it. A student feels that it is impossible to get good grades, be athletic, in multiple organizations, and most of all appear to be happy. Students have turned to cheating, drug/ alcohol abuse, and even suicide to try and cope. They are competing with friends for top spots, and believe that if they don’t beat them, they are a failure. Not only other students, but parents play a big roll, too. Their own parents and the parents of their peers will compare kids. New Trier High School’s Jim Conroy said that the biggest problem about pressure comes from the parents who compare (Robbins). With all...
My story began on a cool summer’s night twenty short years ago. From my earliest memory, I recall my father’s disdain for pursuing education. “Quit school and get a job” was his motto. My mother, in contrast, valued education, but she would never put pressure on anyone: a sixty-five was passing, and there was no motivation to do better. As a child, my uncle was my major role-model. He was a living example of how one could strive for greatness with a proper education and hard work. At this tender age of seven, I knew little about how I would achieve my goals, but I knew that education and hard work were going to be valuable. However, all of my youthful fantasies for broader horizons vanished like smoke when school began.
As a little girl I looked up to my mother and strove to become like her. There was one specific thing that I remember from my mother during my childhood and that was a necklace with her first initial given to her by my father during their courting. When the time came and I was old and responsible enough for jewelry I had asked her for a necklace similar to hers with my first initial. Her response to me was the usual you should earn everything you own and I did exactly that with my academic success in elementary school. The truth is I never really wanted the necklace that desperately, but my stubbornness to give up something that I wanted kept me going.
Education was very important to my father. Once I started attending school my grades took precedence over anything else in my life. My dad helped me with school work when I needed it, so bad grades were out of th...
Success is its own reward, they said, deciding that a child’s internal drive to succeed is far more important in long run than money. While a cash incentive may give a short-term boost, its long-term effect is mixed at best. This is a viewpoint not favored by most students. Why should students work for nothing? They’re basically working a job!
We as educators and parents want our children to grow up to be the best that they can be. Are we helping them when we tell that they are doing a good job on something or are we hurting them? Some research has shown that praising a child with words like “Good Job” or “Way to Go” is not helping them build their self-esteem or grow as individuals. We need to do more to help them grow as individuals and learners. According to Alfie Kohn (2001) “praise is a verbal reward” (p. 1). He states in his article “Five Reasons to Stop Saying Good Job” that praise is also controlling (Kohn, 2001) Have you ever been at a restaurant or out to local grocery store (or even said to your own kids) and hear if you will be good I will buy you a treat. Controlling? Yes controlling, but in the classroom do we use the same type of praise to get our students to do the same thing?
According to Berk (2012), children with a history of parental criticism of their worth and performance give up easily when faced with a challenge and express shame and despondency after failing (p. 367)”. Knowing that children who come from a home where they are not being encouraged and are constantly being put down can help me as a teacher in my future classroom. Knowing this I know how important it is to encourage my students so that they can build up their self-esteem. Berk (2012) states, “Adults can avoid promoting self-defeating reactions by adjusting their expectations to children’s capacities, scaffolding children’s attempts at difficult tasks, and pointing out effort and improvement in children’s work or behavior (p.367)”. This is important for me as a future teacher so I know that not all students in my class are going to perform at the same level and that is okay. I will know to point out when a student is doing something good and showing improvement in their work even if it is not the best yet. I want all of my students to have high self-esteem and feel good about themselves and their work because, I know how important having high self-esteem is for a child and how it will help them throughout their
The reward system is a beneficial behavioral modification teaching method, which promotes more positive behaviors in the classroom (Charles & Barr, 2014). Many teachers generally use the reward method of praise within their classrooms for a variety of reasons. The first advantage of using praise within the classroom is because it encourages students do repeat positive behaviors in the classroom. Many children are simply looking for attention and enjoy it, which makes it a great technique to use in the classroom (Charles & Barr, 2014). Another advantage for this reward type is that due to the encouragement, the students are able to perform at a better rate; students excel academically. A final advantage to using praise is that it is easily implemented into the classroom and requires little to no preparation. This makes the reward method a great addition for teachers as well as students because students get instant feedback without
Pells, R. (2017, June 10). Parents who see failure as negative bring up children who do not believe they can improve, research suggests. Retrieved November 15, 2017, from http://www.independent.co.uk/news/education/education-news/parents-who-see-failure-as-negative-bring-up-children-who-do-not-believe-they-can-improve-research-a7074331.html