“Liking is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts”
It has always been possible to find it in our pockets. A big part of our social life is focused on them, maybe too much, and they are produced in many different shapes. It is the smartphone. Many people really care about their smartphone and maybe they care too much about it, to put it mildly. However, is it possible to be too fond of your smartphone? Is it the phone that you are caring about or is it the idea of being able to get in touch with others over the social medias? Or is it just the smart functions? Moreover, many experts, scientists etc. are questioning the reliability of the phone as a socializing machine.
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Go for What Hurts” in 2011. It is based on his commencement speech, which he delivered to college students at Kenyon College in Ohio, where he advised the students to put away their phones and socialize instead.
Already from the beginning of the essay is Jonathan Franzen comparing his relationship to his phone like a normal love affair where the sparkle is missing. However, he replaces the old Blackberry with a much more powerful Blackberry Bold. During this comparison he uses many words, which the young audience is familiar with. He uses expressions that the youngsters know from their own love affairs like “trust issues”, “one sided relationship” and many more. Already from the beginning he is trying to be on par with the young audience. However, when having this comparison Jonathan Franzen has the opportunity to determine, with expressions the youngsters understand, that he did outgrown the relationship. During his comparison he is personifying the smartphone. He mentions that the replaced phone did not throw terrible scenes when an even sexier object replaced it. He is actually comparing the phone with a human, it did not lose its temper, but if it wanted too it would have done
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Basically all our actions online is risk-free according to Jonathan Franzen. We can be “friends” with someone even though we had a word exchanged with the person. We do give many likes especially on facebook, twitter and instagram, but it is not because of a deep felling that we are “liking”, it is just a thing that we do because it is risk-free. Furthermore, when you give something a “like” is far from the same as loving someone or something else. Because giving someone a “like” is risk-free, but when you truly put yourself out there in the real world and start loving someone, then there is a possibility of being badly hurt. And that is the real life. The real life is filled with risks. It is of course possible to meet people through net-dating and similar stuff. But then the question is;” Would you rather get the first impression of a person online were all the technological tools had helped creating a “fake” person, and where liking and so is risk-free? Or would you meet in real life where you standing in front of a real person, who is not hiding behind a screen and just “liking” your pictures status updates and so on? The answer should be clearly option number two should be the one and that is also what Jonathan Franzen wants us to say. The pain of loss, of breakup etc. is some of the things he mentions that makes us avoid love and only makes us giving “likes”. However,
People spend more time staring at their phone than they do at each other. ANALYSIS Chris Morris’s “Is technology killing the human touch?” The purpose of this article is to inform that people spend more time on social networks than with family and friends. The author gives an example of how technology changes our behavior “that can impact communication, relationships and our day-to-day interactions with others” (Morris).
People demand to be acknowledged the likes they get satisfy that need. The more active you are on social media you are the more popular you are or so it seems. You will be considered friendlier and will be invited to more events. Some people get so mesmerized by their online profile that they put this before their family or friends something simple like going on a hike may not be for exercise but a photo shoot for the perfect picture. Murphy also says that people can get obsessed with the number of likes they get. They are willing to do anything for a picture even if it means endangering the people around
Is it possible for one to not use their phone constantly? Relying on it for simple math, to take an aesthetic picture of their food, or simply to whine to one's followers about how expensive the latte they just purchased was, phones are always being used and it’s affecting us. “The Veldt” is written by Ray Bradbury and is about a rich family whose children become attached to a room called the nursery which leads them to hurt others. Susan Green writes an article, “Modern technology is changing the way our brains work” that explains the harsh effects of a screen. This connection is relevant now because everyone has a gadget whether it be a phone,computer, or television.
Smartphones have become an extension of one’s self, capturing memories, storing information, communicating an individual’s thoughts and feelings, setting reminders etc. It has become a necessity that many people feel they cannot live without. However, their usefulness comes with a price. A price Carr states and backs up with multiple studies researching the effect smartphones have on the brain and human interactions.
...Five percent of Americans who are in a marriage or a committed relationship say they met their significant other online” (2). The reality of how relationships are started is through the traditional methods of meeting people offline. People like to meet others through introductions and referrals because it provides a sense of security. Due to the direction that society is headed, we are seeing more and more technological advances. These new advances are giving people the freedom to meet and integrate with others in the society in a safe fashion. However, we know that technology is not one-hundred percent safe proof. Because technology is not completely safe and is not always accurate individuals must use common sense to determine when a situation is not being used properly. Online dating sites through the technological advances are getting lots of recognition.
In “Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts,” Jonathan Franzen highlights the fact that technology has taken over our lives so much that we have become incapable of loving someone. We have attached ourselves to our gadgets so much that it is almost as if we are in a relationship with them. However, this relationship is, he says, one sided. The technology, which is so beloved to us, has become nothing but an extension of ourselves. Due to this, we have immersed ourselves into a world of liking. To like is much easier than to love, for by falling in love we make ourselves vulnerable to pain and suffering. Liking, on the other hand, does not require any commitment whatsoever. However, the author states that, “To live through a life painlessly
The society today is extremely affected by social media and the constantly evolving technology. People are becoming increasingly narcissistic, changing themselves online solely get more ‘likes’. Our behaviour on social media is to a great extent risk free, where loving in the real world is full of risks. In his speech ‘Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts’, the American novelist and essayist Jonathan Franzen addresses these risk free narcissistic tendencies, asking whether the risks of love in real life are really worth it.
Social relationships are essential for one to function properly within today’s society. Cell phones have affected social relationships by changing them from social conduct to contacting someone through a text message. “ Research in human interaction using communication technology like text messages and phone calls could deepen an understanding on how society manages their everyday life” (Rippen). Cell phones have become such a necessity in everyday life that cell phone users rely on a device to manage their everyday social relationships. Cell phone users can manage their social relationships with the touch of a screen. The user can access facebook, send a tweet, send an email, text, or call anyone anywhere in the world. As of lately cell phone users seem to be driven by their own need to be connected to anyone with in seconds. Some people find it overwhelming when it comes to manage their social relationships and have issues when confronted with human contact.
With technology advances steadily in today’s society, individuals steadily advance too. One of these aspects includes dating. Individuals in today’s society hope to find companionship through online dating websites so that someday some online daters might be able to find a companion. With websites like eHarmony, Match, Christian Mingle, OkCupid, Black People Meet, and JDate, finding the one seems to be easier and more convenient than ever. Most of these websites even display statistics showing that one out of five relationships start online. The questions that should be asked, is this a better and safer option than looking for the one in person? Individuals tend to ignore the possible risks involving online dating. They are willing to release personal information from pictures of oneself, to locations of where they work, or live just for the possibility of finding a companion. The online users have to ask themselves: is the risk worth it in the end, or does the benefit outweighs the cost? When searching for a companionship through online dating websites, negative aspects such as profiles, self-presentation, self-disclosure, predators and sexual mishaps, may outweigh the positive aspects and cause more problems and strife then actual good.
Online dating offers chances to people who feel more comfortable behind a screen rather than getting so nervous in front of a person that they are unable to speak. It allows them to interact with someone whom they would be uneasy to speak with in real life. Moreover, in traditional dating first impressions truly matter while online, people have chosen the best for their dating profiles. “People were ready to admit that going on actual "dates" was full of pressure and not very enjoyable. Traditional dating, they pointed out, encouraged an overly formal, inauthentic vibe that ultimately hindered instead of helped their efforts to make romantic connections” (Massa). Many do feel shy to ask the person they are interested in on an official date as they are not actually sure what the other person feels and needs more than the opinion of friends to take a step while asking someone online relieves that stress as the possibility of seeing that person in real life is low along with it messing with the asker’s personal life if it is a
The smart phones have affected our culture in many possible ways which leads to increase in personal efficiency and communication. Even though, smartphone can become a tool for constant connection with the world; the smartphone also makes people disconnect with the world around them such as friends and family. As Zackary suggests that “The invention and rising popularity of the smartphone has completely transformed our culture of socialization and interaction.”(2015) Smartphones are very powerful tools that can allow people to use many functions such as phone, text, internet, apps, games, and social media and so on. Smartphones are readily available and so easy to use that people are less willing to interact with another people more than their smartphone. Smartphone becomes a necessity for many people of their life because of their usefulness. We constantly see people who are using their smartphone more often, which a
Raise your hand if you’re one of 44% of Americans that sleep next to their phones at every night. It’s true, so many of us are dependent on our mobile devices, that psychologists are now calling it the “Invisible Addiction”! Since its invention critics have debated every inch of the cell phone. From its usefulness and size, to its effects on health after prolonged usage. The conversation has since shifted. The cell phone market today is flooded with a plethora devices to choose from, sporting top of the line materials and industry leading software, but this just scratches the surface. With over 968 million worldwide smartphone sales in 2013, consumers are feeding into the latest technology that the market has to offer. Though they may become
The capabilities of this device had been unheard of before. However, is there more to this technology than what has been made known to their owners? We have become overly obsessed with these devices and how it has impacted our humanity – our interaction with others and society. Since its upbringing, the invention of the smartphone has come to negatively reinvent the way people go about their daily lives because we have become detached from society, let these smartphones govern our lives, and have become obsessed with these devices. To begin with, the smartphone allows its user to detach him/herself from society.
The world today is a result of centuries of evolution; one of the major adaptations is technology, specifically the invention of the smartphone. The smartphone is a cellular phone that has the capabilities of performing similar functions to that of a computer (Oxford Dictionaries’ online dictionary, n.d.). The smartphone is owned by youth for the most part; however, adults and seniors are also turning toward using this device. This in turn demonstrates the popularity of this marvelous device, and is the reason why it is constantly monitored by its users. The continuous evolving of the populations' wants and needs such as communication, searching of information, entertainment and recording, makes owning a smartphone essential, and beneficial as it is portable, reliable and efficient.
Cell phones have changed from an item of luxury to an everyday necessity for some people. Twenty five years ago, a phone was just a way to contact someone. Mobile phones have become one of the most common tools of communications for both young and old. Cellular devices have redefined relationships and social conduct, and transformed the daily lives of many individuals. Cell phones no longer function just as a communication device. Today it has many other uses. Cell phones are used for games, calculators, texting, calendars, social sites, and pictures. In addition, there are many apps that one can download on a phone. Mobile phones help us keep track of our lives.