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Literary essays mother daughter relationship
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Frida Boyelski’s Shiva
As a parent, you always try to do what is best for your children. You want them to be happy, and you never want to lose them. At some point, you might wonder: How will I react if one of my children is transgender – will I support or leave them? A love between a mother and a daughter may seem as strong as ice in a cooler, but perhaps one alteration can change everything.
The short story “Frida Boyelski’s Shiva” was written in 2016 by Abigail Ulman, who is a writer from Melbourne Australia. Abigail Ulman’s story follows one significant theme, namely the bond between a mother and a daughter. The story follows a woman named Frida Boyelski’s Shiva, who is the mother of Ruthie Boyelski, or as the story evolves, the mother
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This can be explained by stating that the story begins and ends in the same place. The story begins in the house with Frida learning that her daughter, Ruthie, is transgender . Afterwards, Frida calls in sick for work, calls a Jewish Newspaper, and puts a message in the Bereavements section. Subsequently, she holds a “shiva” , which lasts for seven days, where several people visit her, and blame themselves for what ‘happened’ to her daughter , including Frida’s ex-husband, Ruthie’s father, who blames Frida . At the end, Frida and Ruthie is back at the house, where they have a talk, and Frida’s daughter is now her son, Rafael.
As for the narrative technique, the story is written in the third person, and the story is seen from Frida’s point of view. Even though the story is written in the third person, the narrator does have access to Frida’s thoughts and feelings. The story also contains direct speech and flashbacks , which make it seem that the narrator either is, in fact, Frida or Ruthie, or someone who was a part of the events. Additionally, you can add that the narrator is limited, because the narrator only has access to Frida’s thoughts and feelings, but not to
Ester Hernandez is a Chicana artist, best known for her works of Chicana women. Ester’s goal is to recreate women’s lives to produce positive images of women’s lifestyle and to create icons. Her piece, Frida y Yo, contains the iconic painter Frida Kahlo. Frida, after being in multiple accidents causing long-term pain and suffering, began painting, mostly self-portraits, to portray her reality and glorify the pain. Similar to how Hernandez's goals are a juxtaposition to Frida’s artwork, the art piece Frida y Yo creates a juxtaposition between life and suffering and death and fortune.
The medicalization of transgender tendencies, under what was Gender Identity Disorder, was demoralizing to all transgender people. This resulted in a form of structured and institutionalized inequality that made an entire group of people internalize their problems, making them question not only their own identity, but also their sanity. Therefore, the removal of this disorder from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) in 2013 and the newest editions was important in that it shows society’s recognition and acceptance of the transgender
Many transgender people lived in dysfunctional families when they were young. The support becomes vital for the wellbeing of kids. In her book Redefining Realness by Janet Mock, recaps the importance of support from Michelle his cousin, who kept in secrets of gender dysphoria of Charles (Keisha) by saying “‘Pinkie –swear you won’t tell your mom’…She’d keep the secret my secret because I was her favorite cousin” (Mook 76). Michelle, kept Keisha’s secret by allowing her to use her swimming clothes. Michelle shows the importance of support from relatives. This is a fundamental factor that might help with the development of her gender identity. Many transgender people may feel a relief at the time to disclose their identity. When transition is in progress the support from friends and families becomes important because, many transgender people might suffer if they lack support. Many transgender people seem depressed because they are rejected by society. Janet Mock, relates how Wendi, support Charles, by making him feel comfortable, saying “Wendi and I grew inseparable trough middle school, a bond that would link us for the rest of our lives. Through association, my class –mates learned that I was like Wendi-who hadn’t yet adopted any labels to describe her shifting self” (Mook 107). In most cases transgender people’s acquaintances can be referred as transgender people just by friendship. The association makes transgender people to gain confidence about their gender identity. The support from groups or friends makes transgender people feel that they are accepted and not alone. Support from friends might urge transgender people to come out the “closet” and reveal their gender identity to gain respect among society. The support from friends is important, but family support seems to be the most important. When families do not support transgender people it causes a hostile environment that may suppress
Frida Kahlo was an amazing woman whose many tragedies influenced her to put her stories into her paintings. She was born in July 6th 1907 to a Mexican Roman Catholic mother who was of Indian and Spanish decent and a German photographer father. Frida had three sisters, Mitilde and Adriana, who were older and Christina who was younger. She learned about Mexican history, art and architecture by looking at her father’s photography. When Frida was six she got polio and it was a long time before she would heal completely. After surviving polio, Frida’s right leg became weak and thin, so her father encouraged her to play sports to help her.
Bos, H. M., Van Balen, F., & Van den Boom, D. C. (2007). Child adjustment and parenting in planned lesbian-parent families. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry, 77, 38-48. doi:
Born in 1910, Frida was a woman that was not about preserving young beauty. She loved to acquaint herself with Mexico, where she was born. Being a great painter, she loved to paint pictures of herself. A quote by her is as follows “I paint myself because I am so often alone and because I am the subject I know best”. In other words, she can paint and feel free, because she knows herself well and can paint the
Allowing a child to identify with who they feel they are (meaning transgender) is fine as long as the child is taught about the pain they may experience in a loving way of course. I have seen several 20/20 specials on transgender children and my heart aches for them. I did not like the fact that an early age the parents were taking the children for hormone shots. I think the children our too young to make a life changing decisions and the parents should just love/support them until they are truly old enough to understand the impact on their life. My thoughts were what if the child changes his/her mind. What if the female child grows out of being a tomboy and wants to be a frilly girl. What if the boy is actually bisexual and wants to stay a boy? There were follow-up specials when the child became a teenager as well as specials on transgender adults. I believe the older the child gets the more it is about the child’s sexuality and this is why the parents should wait before starting the sex change
Puberty is a difficult time for any child, but for transgender teens, it can be the difference between becoming who they want to be or remaining in the wrong body. In June of this year, PBS Frontline released a documentary, entitled Growing Up Trans, which chronicled the lives of eight transgender and nonbinary children, from the ages of 9 to 19, as they navigated through the process of transitioning to their prefered genders. Some of the kids took hormone blockers to slow down their puberty, others were going through puberty at the time and wanted to transition before it was complete, and one had already gone through puberty and was still taking hormones to transition. The controversy revolving around the documentary focused on whether or
Since the story was written in the third person objective, it is easier for the reader to remain objective while analyzing the story. If we one were to hear the story from on of the character’s point of view, the retelling of the story would be clouded with various em...
Seventy-three transgender children who were allowed to express their gender identity freely, forty-nine of their siblings and seventy-three non-transgender children were involved in the study. None of the transgender children had taken hormone, but they lived freely to express their gender identity. The study measured anxiety and depression levels. For depression levels all the numbers were almost all the same. Anxiety levels for all the children varied. Transgender children had higher levels of depression and anxiety than the siblings or non-transgender children, but the variables were only one or two numbers more. These transgender children were relatively happy with their lives as they were able to live with the gender identity they wanted. Letting transgender live the identity they feel comfortable can improve their mental health in the long run. (“Transgender
Living life as a transgendered person is not easy. There are very few times when someone comes out as transgender and their lives are still relatively easy to manage. There are a copious...
...er roles. The US has medicalize transgenderism to being a disorder where they face transsexualism, this act of diagnosing transsexualism as a disorder is also dangerous because it would make the child feel as though they are an anomaly. What some parents have recommended for people who have transgender children to is just let them embrace it and to help them to be happy with who they are. The parents say to do this because the child would feel depression and face problems developing in the future.
For most people, the idea of Transgenders is new and complicated. Because the idea is so fresh, many adults struggle with how to address this topic to the children because they lack knowledge
Transgender Today Nowadays, there are lot of unexpected changes coming in our lives every day which are challenging to our society. Gender issues are one of the hot topics among new changes. Transsexuality is a critical part of this gender issue. After reading the article “Night to his day” by Judith Lorber, I found a clarification regarding the social construction of gender. While looking for some facts about transgender, I have also found a lot of articles with different points of views from researchers, scientists and individuals who have transformed from their origin to transgender men/women.
There indicators of child developmental outcomes were categorized into parent and child relationship quality, children’s cognitive development, children’s gender role behavior, children’s gender identity, children’s sexual preference, and children’s social and emotional development. There analysis showed that children with same-sex parents fared equally to children raised by heterosexual parents when comparing developmental outcomes. Same-sex parents also reported a significantly better relationship with their children than heterosexual parents, which was measured by the parent or child perception of the quality of their relationship. This goes back to the argument that parent sexuality has no impact on the child but rather the relationship between the parent and the child has is the most impactful. In Crowl, Ahn and Baker (2008) meta-analysis study also found that the parent sexual orientation had no effect on gender identity, cognitive development, psychological adjustment, and sexual