Stories are constructed by humans as a narrative to make sense of situations in everyday life. On the simplest level, stories are how we understand the world around us and learn how to grow. They are also how information is transported from one generation to the next. Conflict stories are powerful because they allow us to reconstruct our perceived reality and the events that occurred during the conflict. Doing so allows us to justify our actions and rationalize the steps we took during times of turbulence. They are also powerful because the way we mold our stories to ourselves and others can impact our perception of the situation. The story we choose to believe can shape whether we see ourselves as the hero or the villian in the story. Stories …show more content…
On an external level, I rationalized with myself and told myself that what my friend did was wrong because she always engages in acts that would hurt me. When expressing how I felt to other friends, I only managed to talk about all the negative things this friend has done while completely ignoring the positives. On an internal level, I excused myself for my shortcomings as measures I took to protect myself and that I did not have any ill intentions. When talking to others, I mostly mentioned all the positive things I have done for this friend and victimized myself in the situation. Finally, at the core I knew deep down that our conflict wasn’t just about one specific event, it was a buildup of what had been occurring prior to the outburst. I understood that one of my core values of respect had been violated multiple times, and I expected her to know that without ever explicitly explaining it to her. Finally my ego had prevented me from talking to her, adding even more to the fire and closing a door to open communication. What I justified in my internal story as fair because it was her supposed responsibility to reach out to me, was actually what stood out as my ego in my core …show more content…
Learning about storytelling not only helps us gain more clarity within our personal conflicts, but also helps us become better mediators. From considering this conflict from a story-based perspective, I have much more empathy and compassion for my friend, and for myself. I understand that we are all victims in our own stories and it is important to recognize that conflicts are often the tip of the iceberg. A moment of clarity was understanding that I was too critical of myself by not being honest about the real reason behind the conflict. Similarly, I have much more compassion for my friend because I may have damaged one of her core values without knowing. This perspective has also provided insight into the validity of our emotions and that just because someone’s intentions were pure doesn’t mean that they didn’t cause pain. Finally, it is in our best interest to recognize that no one is perfect at conflict management but through knowledge about how we use storytelling, and empathy we can all become better communicators in times of
The point of stories it to tell a tale and inflict certain emotions onto the reader. Tim O’Brien uses this in his novel The Things They Carried. These stories were fictional but true, regaling his experiences of war. In the last chapter he writes that stories have the ability to save people. He does not mean “save” in a biblical sense, but as if a person saved the progress on a game they have been playing.
Often, when a story is told, it follows the events of the protagonist. It is told in a way that justifies the reasons and emotions behind the protagonist actions and reactions. While listening to the story being cited, one tends to forget about the other side of the story, about the antagonist motivations, about all the reasons that justify the antagonist actions.
The class of 2015 had been working all year selling food at lunch and sports events and carrying out fundraisers. The first time I got an inkling that my friends would not be true friends was when we were planning the trip, we were choosing rooms for the trip and I asked my best friend, “Hey, we could room with each other on the trip!” To which she replied “Oh I’m staying with someone else and we can’t have 5 people in a 4 person room.”. When I asked where she thought I could stay she said “Well I don’t know.” I was torn, I had just been betrayed by my best friend, I had been treated like this before, but I just put up with it and somehow I had a feeling it would not be the last. Instead of being in a room with my best friend, I was assigned a room with three girls I did not know well. In the long run being in that room was one of the highlights of the trip for me.
Stories are a means of passing on information, acting as a medium to transport cultural heritage and customs forward into the future. In his essay titled "You'll Never Believe What Happened," King says that, "The truth about stories is that that's all we are” (King Essay 2). Contained within this statement is a powerful truth: without stories, a society transcending the limitations of time could not exist. Cultures might appear, but they would inevitably die away without a means of preservation. Subsequent generations would be tasked with creating language, customs, and moral laws, all from scratch. In a way, stories form the core of society's existence.
1. Growing up we all heard stories. Different types of stories, some so realistic, we cling onto them farther into our lives. Stories let us see and even feel the world in different prespectives, and this is becuase of the writter or story teller. We learn, survive and entertain our selves using past experiences, which are in present shared as stories. This is why Roger Rosenblatt said, "We are a narrative species."
The importance of a story is to have a purpose and meaning, through this, people are able to engage and learn with what is being told to them, it has to have a connection to the past, bringing it to the present and to involve both the body and mind senses. Through storytelling the audience should gain an understanding and have a sense of emotion touched and come alive, they should also be able to explore the possibilities within their culture and feel a deep connection to country.
Everyone has their opinions on everything that happens in society; we are taught to be opened minded about people and their values, but truth is not many people are. Society makes people believe if you do not fit into what they constrict as the social norm, you either are not valued for your opinion, or you fit the stigma they put around being different. Personal values are one of the biggest clashes we have because not everyone sees eye to eye on things, and this where the conflict starts. “Conflict often implies a moral assessment, because at least one party is seen as pursuing ends that deny the legitimacy of another 's ends.” (Homer-Dixon, 1989). If the conflict that I had, I feel that my personal values were criticized because I use to make people believe that I had the noncaring attitude but when it comes to personal issues, I keep to myself. I was brought up by the quote “ better to get hurt by the truth than comforted with a lie.” (Hosseini, 2003). I felt that my friends were trying to diminish my values with all of them confronting me in such a harsh environment, and having them in a sense ganging up on me. Looking back on this I can understand why they were frustrated with me because the way I went about things I often had that noncaring attitude, and I would say whatever is on my mind, and not care who’s feelings got hurt. Also at the fact that I did not tell them about my personal issues that were going on in my life because it gave them the impression that I did not trust them. Being the person, I am today; I would have told them that everyone has different coping mechanisms for things, and if they could not handle mine then that would be a means to an end of the friendship. I would not change my personal values and mannerism for anyone; it was the way I was brought up, and it is who I am, and if someone cannot accept that they
I felt bad and apologized for eating my half with my family, instead of delaying supper like I should of done. It was rude and I should of waited till it was resolved, so it could of prevented the dispute altogether. I did not think of her feelings or how her fiance would feel, but also I was conflicted due to the time frame for my husband and kids eating first. I should of utilized both Active empathic listening and emotional intelligence. I could of sensed the scenario as being tense, due to lack of communication and assurance that it was the correct pizza. Processing the information was delayed due to hunger and frustration and I should of thought about my actions before serving it out. If i would of responded by checking the pizza, I could of possibly prevented their tension, before it escalated like it did. I should of accepted her cues and assured her that she didn 't know, including that it wasn 't her fault. By supporting her sincerely, I would have to take her to complain and I had a time constraint conflicting this dinner date. By being supportive I could of, "Provided information, comfort, perspective, and aid" (Goldsmith, 2004, p.
I'd challenge anyone to speak out if he or she has not argued over trivial matters with his or her loved ones and closest friends. These relationships cannot be broken, just like a coastline never really disappears, even though both are subject to terrible pressures. I had been studying for the past three hours and felt in need of some refreshment. I saw that my brother was passing the room and called out and asked if he could get me a drink. He shouted back, "Why should I? Get it yourself, you lazy so and so." This, for some reason aggravated me quite a lot as I was beginning to be frustrated by the difficulties of the study material. I did not say anything, but my anger smoldered. For the next two days, I did not speak or communicate with my brother, a feat in itself considering we lived in an apartment. I look back and am ashamed of the way I treated my brother. I also look back and remotely see myself as a desperate Green peace kid trying with one last throw of the dice to save his sanity, by throwing his anger towards them, those who obviously couldn't see the predicament - although that would be a purpose altogether too important to imagine. However, as we all know, this is not an isolated incident. Arguments and fights happen again and again. Just like Kurt Vonnegut's Billy Pi...
Engagement in peaceful and violent interactions, as well as the conflicts consequent from the, has changed greatly in the modern world. With the vast advancement in technology, our ability to communicate over long distances with various media devices has improved the ability to conduct peaceful conversations. This in itself decreases the chances of violence as all party members involved in a conflict of some sort are able to access and correspond with one another, if they so choose, without jumping the gun and heading straight into a violent solution. However, weapon technology develops simultaneously with modern technology, resulting in extreme weapons of mass destruction such as nuclear weapons and the fact that these weapons are so easily accessible enables violent interactions. Both the “Conflict Resolution” and “Nonviolence” paradigms have not been able to keep up with the development of modern technology and are therefore not applicable in some instances. While the “Conflict Resolution” paradigm maintains its applicability for most situations, the “Nonviolence” paradigm becomes obsolete in regards to the nuclear weapons that play such a large role in modern day conflicts. Nevertheless, both paradigms are useful tools in international peacemaking – methods such as negotiation from the “Conflict Resolution” paradigm are independent from the type of conflict involved. Similarly, the “Nonviolence” paradigm has methods e.g. the creation of peace movements, which are applicable to all conflicts regardless of their nature. This shows that while they might be limited in some aspects, the “Conflict Resolution” and “Nonviolence” paradigms are still useful in conflicts nowadays and contribute tools to international peacemaking even tho...
Stories are our essence of life. They grow and change with us. They allow us to reconstruct the pas, and put our slant on things. They don’t’ have make sense, and they don’t all have to be fact. That’s what kind of story this is.
Conflict is something that you encounter pretty much every day. It is almost inevitable that you will not encounter conflict as you through your day or doing anything else. There are different ways to confront conflict, and it depends on the type of person that you are. The different ways that people can confront conflict are either head-on or just complete avoidance. When people avoid a conflict, sometimes it tends to work in their favor, but sometimes it does not and the problem just becomes bigger. Also with handling it head-on there are some major problems. Sometimes the people who confront those conflicts are not people who can express themselves in a good manner, so they tend to blow things out of proportions. “Our basis understanding
Conflict is the state in which contradictory or opposing ideas and action of different entities bring an antagonistic state. Conflict is an evitable part of our life, every one of us has different opinions, ideas and some set of beliefs since we have our ways of looking at things and on how to perceive them through our thinking. This state brings us to find ourselves in some conflict of different types; this may involve some people, group of individual or a struggle that may arise in between ourselves. Consequently, a conflict has a significant influence in our lives hence it must be solved before escalating to some disasters.
Conflict is unavoidable and connected to a world where different ideas and opinions are challenged. Negative conflict occurs when voices are not expressed appropriately, discussions are not in control or different parties reject moving forward with a solution. There is difficulty resolving disagreements because there are multiple reactions to disputes. However, a positive conflict supports debates without a destructive outcome. They improve communication, introduce principles that are important to others, and reduce chaos. On the other hand, the approach that a person uses to address conflict dictates the outcome they receive. Methods for resolving conflict include avoiding the problem, smoothing out a situation, competing against the ideas
In American colloquial English, the word “conflict” has come to be used almost exclusively to convey a negative experience or encounter such as a war, battle, fight, or other dispute. Current conflicts in 2016 include the United States’ wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the presidential election, and Black Lives Matter vs. municipal police departments. However, one of the definitions of the word “conflict” includes a “mental struggle resulting from incompatible or opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or internal demands” (Full definition of conflict, n.d.). The important part to note in this definition is that while the existing “opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or internal demands,” may be incompatible, the use of the word,