Christmas Music: Loss Of A Mom And Dad

Christmas music is playing on almost every radio station; stores are adorned with decorations and holiday planning is in full force. Don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas time. But I have also experienced enormous grief during the holidays. I am writing this post from my perspective and experience of losing both my Mom and Dad. It is only meant to give you some personal outlook on how for some the holidays are not always holly, jolly.

In the past few months, even weeks, I’ve had numerous friends experience the loss of someone they love dearly. When I lost my Mom it was two weeks before Christmas. To be honest, I don’t really remember a lot from Christmas Day. I do remember how my heart was broken and I struggled because I had a 16-month-old that needed Christmas to feel “normal.” When we lose someone close to us, normal is not a word we relate to. Our worlds are turned upside down and inside out. Grief is different and individualized. This is so important to remember. What may work for you, may be totally different for your friend.

Listen to your heart and your head. Folks are going to say all kinds of words, some encouraging and others less so. Take your time. Don’t rush and feel like you need to “put on a happy face.” No one understands exactly what you are feeling. If doing a simple celebration is what you can handle this year, than that is what you should do. I felt pressured by some people to celebrate Christmas right after my Mom passed. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. I left church numerous times to cry in the bathroom and felt like the world around me was passing by while I was stuck. Don’t let yourself feel pressured to do more than you