With the advent of neoliberalism, the practice of mothering in Western society arguably shifted from a manner that simply ensures the growth of a child into one that maximizes the child’s growth (O’Reilly: Intensive Mothering, Oct 16). One representation of this shift is identified by Sharon Hays as intensive mothering in which the mother prioritizes the rearing of her child over the advancement of her professional career by investing most of her energy, time, and financial resources into her child (Hays 414). The novel I Don’t Know How She Does It by Allison Pearson can be analyzed through the perspective of intensive mothering. The protagonist, Kate Reddy, is a successful employee of a top investment managing firm in London who spends her …show more content…
For Hays, intensive mothering is characterized as child-centered parenting in which the mother, as the supposed primary caregiver, must personally obligate herself to the enhancement of her child’s intellectual capacity (Hays 414). Intensive mothers believe that meeting the needs of their child is intrinsically necessary, even in the expense of their careers, and requires substantial investment of mental, emotional, moral, and physical energy. However, as part of her cynical questioning, Hays emphasizes that the practice of intensive mothering is a social construct that is situated within a specific economic and historical context (Hays 410). Therefore, intensive mothering is neither natural nor …show more content…
When intensive mothers are busy with thier responsibilities in the public sphere, due to their belief that a mother is the central caregiver, their temporary replacement must exclusively be female (Hays 414). Even with a female nanny who “leaves the place in a mess, makes a petty point of not putting the dishwasher on […], never gives the correct change from the supermarket and “loses” all the receipts” (Pearson 84), Kate still makes every effort to keep the nanny in her family. From the perspective of intensive mothers, men are not capable of providing the same quality of care that a woman is able to provide (Hays 414). From a gender essentialist perspective, Kate argues that “Emily and Ben need me, and it’s me that they want. […] Daddy is the ocean; Mummy is the port, the safe haven they nestle in to gain the courage to venture farther and farther out each time” (Pearson 169). Therefore, intensive mothers find “alternate mothers,” that is, credentialed female child-care providers (Hays 412) such as Paula, Kate’s nanny, as well as Jo, Alice’s nanny who are able to promote the intellectual enrichment of their
Are all mothers fit for motherhood? The concept of motherhood is scrutinized in the stories “The Rocking Horse Winner” and “Tears Idle Tears”. In “The Rocking Horse Winner” by D.H Lawrence the mother, Hester, unpremeditatedly provokes her son into providing for her through gambling. In the story “Tears Idle Tears” by Elizabeth Bowen, Mrs. Dickinson disregards her son’s emotions and puts more emphasis in her appearance than her son’s wellbeing. Hester and Mrs. Dickinson both were inadequate mothers. Both the mothers were materialistic, pretended to love their offspring, and their dominance hindered their children’s progress in life.
She describes this supermom as a strong, liberated, put together, balanced woman, managing her image, work load, and motherly duties with no hassle. But, when the image is presented to real life working mothers the reality was far from the depiction. The reality was that most households struggle with the after work care of their own homes and families. There is an imbalance of shared duties and the reality of time devoted to work in the home for cleaning, laundry, cooking, and childcare calculated into countless hours that deemed the tasks to equate to working a second shift. The more important task of tending to the children seemed to receive the least amount of dedication and yet it is the most important that should be recognized. Hoschchild notes a study conducted by Alexendar Szalai between 1965-1966 that reflects, “…a random sample of 1,243 working parent showed that working women averaged three hours a day on housework while men averaged seventeen minutes: women spent fifty five minutes a day …exclusively with their children; men spent twelve minutes”
“How to Be a Mean Mother”. Mommy Has to Work. Global Influence. 8 May 2010. Web. 20 June 2010.
However, the focus of the reinforcement of conventional gender roles is young women; this is an attempt to resist women’s fight for equality and opportunities to leave domesticity during the second wave of feminism in the sixties. In the legend the babysitter is a young woman whose task is to take care of children, the whole scenario is set to be a type of role play with the babysitter as the mother (Snopes, “The Babysitter and the Man Upstairs”). Support for this perspective of traditional gender role reinforcement are the expectations held about babysitters as care givers for the period of time in which children’s’ parents are not present. In support of the reinforcement of women staying in the private sphere to take care of children and do more homely and conventional tasks – namely not working in the public space alongside men – is in the way the legend acts as a cautionary tale. While the babysitter is expected to do tasks expected of women such as caring for children the fact that the babysitter is working and outside of the home is a reference to feminists’ resistance to traditional femininity. The conflict in the role of the babysitter, coupled with her failure to protect herself and the children in her charge, becomes a statement about how women should not move away from their roles in the home for they are vulnerable without men to protect them. Therefore, the telling of this legend accomplishes the task of reinforcing traditional gender
"Child Care and Elder Care." Women in American Society. Melissa J. Doak. 2010 ed. Detroit: Gale, 2010. Information Plus Reference Series. Opposing Viewpoints in Context. Web. 4 May 2014.
Parenting has been a long practice that desires and demands unconditional sacrifices. Sacrifice is something that makes motherhood worthwhile. The mother-child relationship can be a standout amongst the most convoluted, and fulfilling, of all connections. Women are fuel by self-sacrifice and guilt - but everyone is the better for it. Their youngsters, who feel adored; whatever is left of us, who are saved disagreeable experiences with adolescents raised without affection or warmth; and mothers most importantly. For, in relinquishing, a mother feels strong and liberal; and in guild she finds the motivation to right wrong.
Webb appeals to parents by using appeals to her being a mother, and she could improve her article in numerous ways. To make her article bett...
Women, however, have had the very different role of the "universal caretaker." This translates into the woman being responsible for all that is within the privat...
Eva’s lack of value for motherhood shaped the lives of her family as well as her own. Because of her negative feelings toward motherhood, many of the people surrounding her have similar values. Eva reflects her community’s negative perception of motherhood by being straightforward about it and passing it down through her family
The mother's employment provided skills and resources that meant they could meet their children's emotional, developmental and material needs better.” Mrs. Reynolds believed that women having to work outside the home provided them with skills that they would not have been able to get while just staying at home. And since the children saw their own mother working they looked up to them like Tracey says “Many mothers also stressed the importance of being a good role model for their children.” Since the children looked up to their mothers that just means they are influencing their children positively. But it wasn’t just the children that benefited from their mothers working from Tracey’s perspective. The men were happy that the women were working because “enhancing the quality of their relationship together, and recognized the way in which work enabled their partner to develop and express different aspects of her identity” (Reynolds). What Tracey believed is that by women working it helped round out the relationship between a woman and her husband.
W. S. Ross once said “The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.” As simple as this quip may sound, its complex implications are amplified through the life of every person born since the beginning of humanity. What attribute makes a mother such an extraordinary influence over her young? One such attribute is the ability to nurture. Beyond the normal challenges of cooking, cleaning, schooling, singing, feeding, and changing is the motivation by which such sacrifices are made possible. One cannot raise a child without mutual respect. Emotion and anxiety must drive her instincts. Her ability to foster is only heightened by minute personal imperfections and overwhelming responsibility that lead to a lack of confidence. Yet the prevailing characteristic that separates a ‘birth giver’ from a ‘mother’ is the unconditional, undying, and at times underestimated love for her child. To be a mother in the purest sense, she must embrace this notion of nurture.
When I was young I remember my mother and grandmother raising me. They instilled most of my beliefs and morals. They taught me to always be polite, understanding, and cautious. All mothers in the world want their children’s lives to better than their own. Hoping that they can reach their highest potential. Instilling their own beliefs and morals from what their parents taught them. Passing knowledge down from generation to generation is important. +Having read Betty Rollin’s “Motherhood: Who Needs It?” I disagree with her notion that motherhood is not instinctual. *She does not prove her point using female psychology, religion, and animal studies. Reading Betty Rollin’s “Motherhood: Who needs it?” makes me realize how much people differ in this world today.
Firstly, being a mother is the greatest full time job which women can carry out as a hard and accurate mission. The significance of the motherhood role can be represented in its responsibility for building a strong society which is able to push the wheels of progress and prosperity of any country. Surely, building that society depends on the process of the proper upbringing of its kids in which mothers play the most vital and critical role. According to Christina Fisanick in her essay “Working Women” she mentions that there are many proofs that the best thing for the growth and evolution of the future leaders is a mother paying great at...
In her essay, “Motherhood: Who Needs It?”, Betty Rollin emphasizes the pressures of motherhood that society puts on women and highlights the fact that becoming a mother is not a natural instinct.
To gain insight on the role of being a working mother I interviewed my mother, Jane Smith. Smith currently works forty, or more, hours a week as an office manager for a family business. Her job requires her to be at work from eight in the morning until five or six in the evening Monday through Friday. In addition to her role as an employee, she is currently married and is a mother of four daughters. These daughters are between the ages of thirteen and twenty-one; of these four daughters, three live at home with the family while the other is currently completing a study-abroad year in Germany. Smith has been a working mother for the past seven years, before which she worked as a stay-at-home parent. Her job requires her ...